Years ago I went to Al-Anon and the things I learned there I still try to use on a daily basis and they are what I call upon when I am in a situation or moment where things are not calm.
There are so many quotes that I LOVE but I think this one is so important to my life right now.
A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
This is so important not only for me to remember but for me to teach the children. Coming from a home of trauma and chaos I didn't learn this and as an adult it a lot harder to change the way we have been for so much of our lives.
Having 3 little girls in the house who have come from a home that had a different type of trauma and chaos this is an important lesson to learn so they don't repeat their history and in the future can have respectful, loving relationships.
When we allow people to treat us however they want despite how we feel for any period of time it teaches them they can treat you like that all time. It makes it far harder to create those boundaries later on.
You can be the kindest, sweetest, gentlest, person on the planet which is great and wonderful and more people should be like that. But at the same time you have to hard set on your boundaries or some people will take advantage of this and not treat you the same.
Many of us who love freely, give freely and accept people for who are tend to not have so many boundaries and then we end up getting hurt. That hurt could come in the form of mentally, emotionally or physically.
Having boundaries isn't a bad thing, only those who want to hurt us will think that they are. You are allowed to have boundaries! You are worthy of having boundaries! You deserve to have boundaries!
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