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Monday, December 31, 2018

Slacking Christmas edition!!

Between Lexi being sick, dying and Christmas (7 of them to be exact) I have been slacking to say the least on, well, EVERYTHING.

When you have a disease such as Fibromyalgia doing day to day tasks can be draining but add on everything else this time of year and losing a foster baby it makes things even worse.

I know excuses, poor pity me well, no that's not why I am writing this post. There is a few reasons and none of which is poor pity me.

Millions of people all around the world suffer from chronic diseases (Fibro is just one of them) and the holidays are extra hard requiring more recovery time afterwords. I know its hard for someone outside looking in to understand, but those who have someone close to them battling daily need to keep this in mind when expecting them to just get over it and push forward. Let them sleep, rest, do nothing, even help them with that and other daily tasks that need done during this recovery period. Do your best not to judge, criticize or belittle! They are fighting a battle that they hope you will never have to experience.
To those going through it just remember you will get through it, just like last time, and just like the next time. You are important, loved, needed and YOU GOT THIS!!!

I slacked on Christmas this year big time. I suffered an injury that I still haven't recovered from a week before Christmas due to an altercation with a young women at the police station. My right wrist, elbow and shoulder were dislocated and currently my elbow is still out of place and cannot be put back until the swelling comes down, so the baking didn't get done and the orders didn't get out as fast as they normally do.

This year I did the bare minimal for decorating as in the tree went up and the kids decorated it. The presents got wrapped minus the fancy ribbons, bows and Santa Sleighs. The only baking that got done were a few cookies and the pies that had to be done for the dinners. The kindness isn't finished yet but it will get done and I figure after the holidays is when people could use the uplift the most. We made gingerbread houses but they were not from scratch.

Limited school based learning got done. I wont say limited homeschooling because over this holiday season Blaine learned a lot!

Normally I would say I will do better next year, not going to say that this year because I can't say I wont have a foster die next Christmas, I can't say something wont happen to cause slacking again.

What I can say tho is no one noticed. The kids didn't care that the gingerbread came from a box, or the house and yard wasn't decorated to the nines. No one at the 7 Christmas's cared that my bake trays were lacking or the presents didn't have fancy bows or Santa Sleighs.

There was something this Christmas that made my heart sing. I watched my dad play with my son (tears as I write this). My dad and I had a tough relationship and he wasn't a huge part of my life growing up. I have some memories of some good things but not a whole lot (the brain injuries took many of my memories away and in some cases its a good thing and in others it sucks), Christmas at my grandmothers triggered a memory of building go carts together and racing them. My dad bought my son these race cars that smash into each other. My dad and him had a blast playing with them, I watched my dad smile and laugh and my son call him "My grandpa" all day, "my grandpa come play, my grandpa watch this" I watched my dad light up in a way I haven't seen since I was very very young (under 7).  On the way home my son kept asking when he can see "my grandpa" over and over. A feeling of pride, love and happiness that my dad gets to have this time with him and wants to have this time with him was beyond words.



Thursday, December 13, 2018

Foster: Lexi

My sexi lexi is the sweetest, most loving, snuggle bug of a dog. I fell in love with her which says a lot because I am not a small dog or female dog fan. EVERYONE who meets her falls in love instantly!


Lexi came into care in May/June she came from just north of London. She was covered in these weird red bumps all over her body, smelled horrible, had horrible breath and was thought to have been pregnant. She got her shots, antibiotics and spay.

She was only about 7 months old just a baby and was leaking urine, peeing in her crate and the house all of which I thought was from house training. The leaking urine I thought was just from her spay.




Lexi LOVES Blaine and they have so much fun playing, but I noticed she is the worlds laziest puppy ever. I figured it was just the way she was and hey shes easy. We got the peeing and pooping in the house fixed, but she was still leaking and peeing in her crate.

Hiking is her passion and she looks stunning doing it. I can't figure out why she isn't putting on weight like I would like to see and pass it off as shes just active, or maybe like bossco and take years to finally fill out. She could careless about dogs walking by her but people has to know and love them ALL. I think she would make an amazing therapy pup.



Lexi is sick very sick, can't keep anything down, wont get up on the couch or bed, acting funny, and still leaking when she sleeps or walks. We take her to the vet because of the time of year he thinks she are toxic grass, we always avoid areas with signs and I have never seen her eat grass but okay. And she has a bladder infection that is why she is leaking. Antibiotics, antitoxins, antacids and special tummy food for 10 days. She lady bits hang out really far so she is going to get bladder infections a lot throughout her life. We do that she starts to act "normal" again, but is still leaking.

This is the third time she has been at a vets office and the third time I have brought up her breath and smell and its the third time I am told oh its normal. She has cranberries for her food to help prevent bladder infections and stuff for her water to help with her breath and whatever the smell from her is.

She has a few people interested in adopting her but I am not sure, something in my gut says she needs to stay. I explain that the leaking is going to be a problem for adopters. This is the 5th time I have brought it up. We all talk at the rescue and decide she needs to see a vet and figure out what is going on. a few weeks pass and I email getting quotes from local vets. The vet she has been seeing is very worried and wants to see her right away.

We go, I will pay this out of pocket so I will let the ladies know as soon as we figure out what is going on. I bring up her breath and smell again, again he says its normal. He tests her blood, urine and looks her all over. We wait 2.5 hours for the rests of both the blood and urine. Her kidneys are failing, some of her results are in the 600's and they are supposed to be 150 etc. Her pancreas isn't working right and her sugar is high, she is also anemic. Okay so what now, he says he would normally recommend over night and fluid push but knows that for rescues money is tight. So he says fed her this, give her these pills, and this pump stuff on her food. Okay I can do that. He says the food I have her on is horrible food (Acana I know it is not vets have limited training on each food and push the one they get money from).



I message the ladies and let them know what is going on, I am in panic mode because leaving that vet made me feel like this is my fault. In all my years of dealing with vets I have never ever been made to feel that way. I don't understand what the hell I missed, how could I have missed this, how could multiple vet visits and 2 different vets have missed this. In my head and gut I know she is dying. "Missy" had a dog who died of kidney failure and as she is explaining symptoms Lexi has been like this since the day she came into care. Everything I passed off as normal or happening for this reason or another was a symptom.

Lexi has to head to the vet in Toronto for IV fluids and more testing to see what the cause is. I am broken, crying, angry, a big old mess. The next morning we head to Toronto and I have decided to get over myself, she needs me to be strong for her! With no idea how long she will be there or even at all I bring all my stuff and her stuff with me in case we are there a day or two or if she needs anything while we are there. The drive down we talk and she sits in the front with me, she is the perfect travel buddy, quite, relaxed and just enjoying the drive. We make a few pee breaks, she hates the cold as much as I do lol.

We get to the vet in Toronto, I showed him the results, I told him everything the vet here told me. He got down on the floor with her and loved her up. I brought up her breath and her smell. Right away he said no that isn't right at all I blurt out HA I AM NOT CRAZY!!! He looks at me funny, I explain then he gets it lol. He said he doesn't believe these results, a dog who looks as healthy and acting the way she is couldn't have these results. I explained that the vet here didn't believe she wasn't throwing up but she wasn't and hasn't been since Sept when she had the antitoxins.

He retested her blood (took about 10 mins), he was in shook. From the outside she looks healthy and normal from the inside she is dying. They decide she needs to stay for the fluid push and they will put her on antibiotics and send her urine away. This could be 1 of three things. Congenial, infection or Lepo. I go home leaving her behind feeling horrible that she has to stay in that place alone and scared, being poked and prodded. I knew in my heart that she wasn't going to get better but "missy" said they had to at least try. I get home I miss her so much, I am going over how I missed this over every moment of her life her. Each day I get an update. They find a heart murmur, in a normal dog IV fluids would not cause a heart murmur. In my head I am going yup its congenial. She has to go to "missy" for the night because the vet is having their Christmas party. They do testing that day and her markers have come down but only by a few points. They do an ultrasound and show "missy" She has one shriveled up kidney that does nothing and one kidney that is very large and missing parts. Well thats batting a thousand. Is it worth taking her back for 1 day or just bring her home because 3 days did pretty much nothing.

 She stays the night with "Missy" falls in love, of course who wouldn't she is perfect.  I pick her up from the vets office and they show me how to do the IV fluids at home. Lexi has about 6 months to live. She is all skin and bones all the weight she had put on is gone in a few days :(. We get home she isn't her self.

6 Months!!! She wont likely make it her second birthday, "Missy" says I am getting good at being a pawpice. Yup becoming an old pro. I am putting together her bucket list and making the next few months as amazing as possible.


A few days later Lexi has 3 major seizures 2 hours apart. She wont come out of her crate much and she never liked her crate, she would only go in it if she had too.





2 days later, she can barely walk, full body spasms when you touch her. Wont eat and wont drink.  I talk to everyone I have 2 options I can go that day or in a week, Lexi wont last a week.

That night Lexi dies, feeling no more pain.

Wednesday, December 12, 2018

Week 14. Fireworks!

The workbooks we are using this week are Morning starters that I got from Dollar Tree, My First Book Of Color Craze that I got from Collar Tree. The book we are reading this week is The Pig Can Fly by Scholastic.

This week requires a bit a of prep, mess and lots of changes of clothes.

Day 1:
Sight word "are" handmade flash cards, workbook, cut straw painting, ABC Mouse, book

Outing: Tumble Time at Bluewater Cheer Athletics

Day 2:
Sight word "are" worksheet, workbook, sponge painting, ABC mouse, book

Outing: Skate/Playgroup

Day 3:
Sight word "are" flash cards, workbook, toilet paper roll painting, ABC Mouse, book

Outing: Playgroup

Day 4:
Sight word "Are" hunt, workbook, coloured salt art, ABC mouse, book

Outing: skate/library

Day 5:
Sight word "are" worksheet, chalk art, ABC Mouse, book, workbook

Outing: Homeschool Chat and Play.


Tuesday, December 11, 2018

35 acts of kindness post 2

This month I decided we were going to do random acts of kindness for our bored activity. This means a lot of prep work for mom lol.



Our acts of kindness are:

Bus fare taped to bus stops
Money taped to washing machines
Homeless bags
Warm bags
Kindness rocks
Kindness bookmarks
Flowers to the people in a retirement home
Flowers to the hospice
Hold the door
Let someone go ahead of us in line
Donate a toy to the toy drive
Donate to Slavation Army
Bring homemade cookies to firehall
Bring homemade treats to our local shelter
Give out Candy Canes
Pass sticker to children in line
Christmas Door Bomb
Pick up trash on a walk
Change taped to a vending machine
Pay for someones tim hortons
Colouring books and Crayons to the hospital
Cookies for the neighbour
Donate food to the local shelter
Cards to soliders over seas
Kindness dinosaurs
$5.00 in a book with a note
Tims card to mailman
Tape quarters to the candy machines at the mall

Because of the size of this blog post I am going to make 2!

Give out candy canes

These will have sayings attached to them and we will give them out around town

Pass stickers to children in line

Waiting sucks as it is but waiting in line at Christmas is even worse. We are going to bring stickers when we go shopping and hand them to children in line behind us.

Christmas Door Bomb

This is a little gift bag with a gift in it left at a random door. 

Pick up trash on a walk

Another really easy one. Bring a bag when we walk the dogs and pick up trash along the way.

Change taped to a vending machine. 
 This is another simple one. You put change in tiny baggies and will tape them to vending machines in the hospital.

Pay for someones Tim Hortons

Another simple one. We will pay for the person behind us in line.


Colouring books and crayons to the hospital.

We will drop off colouring books and crayons to the childrens ward of the hospital.



Cookies for the neighbour

Another simple one. We will drop off a tin of homemade treats to our neighbour.

Donate food to the local shelter.



Once again it is simple. We will fill a bag with food and drop it off to the local shelter



Cards for soldiers over seas. 

This is another simple one. We will fill out a couple cards together and send them over seas for the holidays.

Kindness Dinosaurs

We will place dinosaurs around town with tags on them that say "I am not lost, I am yours. Happy Holidays"

$5.00 in a book with a note

We will put $5.00 in a random book at the library with a note inside.

Tims card to the mailman

 Another amazing person who doesn't get enough credit. So Blaine will be giving ours a tims cards.

Tape quarters to the candy machines in the mall

I never have change and feel bad when I get asked for .25 for the candy machine. So this year we will tape quarters to the candy machines in the mall.


Thats it thats all. They are really rather simple activities, it will just take me a little prep to get everything ready to go. 



 

Monday, December 10, 2018

Week 13 Christmas activities

Finishing up with the ABC sticker book we are moving onto My first book of colour craze its by flowerpot press and I am pretty sure I got it at Dollar Tree. Its another sticker book which helps break up the doing of the other school work.We are still using Morning starters an educational workbook that I likely got at Dollar Tree as well.

This week are reading the book Playful Puppies by scholastic.


Day 1:
Sight word "you" handmade flash cards, workbook, Christmas tree shape sort, ABC Mouse, book

Outing: Tumble time at Bluewater Cheer Athletics and Random Act Of Kindness



Day 2:

Sight word "you" worksheet, workbook, Christmas lights counting sheet, ABC Mouse, book

Outing: Skate/Playgroup and Random Act of Kindness

Day 3:

Sight word "you" flash cards, workbook, Christmas Sense of smell, ABC mouse, book

Outing: Playgroup and Random Act Of Kindness

Day 4:

Sight word "you" hunt, workbook, 5 little reindeer, ABC Mouse, book

Outing: Library and Random Act Of Kindness

For 5 little reindeer I found the song here.  Then I cut everything out of felt and made it an activity.

Day 5:

Sight word "you" worksheet, workbook, Gingerbread house, ABC Mouse, Book

Outing: Homeschool chat and play






Sunday, December 9, 2018

Maybe your not cut out for this!

Maybe you are not cut out for this if your going to act like this every time one dies. Thats a first for me, I don't think anyone has ever said that to me.

The moment losing a foster, a fur baby, a life no matter how small doesn't get to me is the moment my life will end. No one should ever take losing a life be it human or a furbaby as “oh well”.

To many I appear cold, but those who truly know me, know that EVERY effects me. I hold it all together because I have to. Every dog I can not save, every child who is hurting because of others, I feel it ALL. Yes we can't save them all and yes there are worse things for these furbabies than death but it still hurts and you still feel it.

In rescue you see so much everyday, the lowest of humans and what they do to these furbabies. You see death, sorrow, pain, defeat and heartbreak.

Then you see the BEST of humans, you see everyone break down when they lose a furbaby or leave the shelter knowing they can only take so many, spending every last penny they have and begging for funds to help with the mountains of money to cover the cost of saving these babies. You see us holding that furbaby tears in our eyes, holding together just long enough to be strong for them as they cross the bridge then breaking down.

You see the furbabies come from dying defeated by humankind to loving life, learning to trust again and making leaps and bounds. You see a rescue person in tears of sorrow from losing one to tears of joy for one taking their first new steps or giving kisses for the first time.

When you are at your lowest you see the rescue people who stand behind you, to show a love and compassion that we normally only show to a select few humans and the furbabies, you see us show it to those who walk beside you in this mixed up world of animal rescue. You see them come together to support each other in the best ways they can.

What you will NEVER EVER see is us give up, you wont see is quit ( but maybe a break), you wont see us turn away a furbaby, you wont see us not try, and you wont see us leave a furbaby alone.

You will see us be strong for the next one who needs us. You will see us LOVE with a heart that has been broken more times then anyone would think possible. You will see us give our all and when we feel like we have nothing left to give another furbaby will come along and you will watch us give it all again.

A close friend in rescue who is far away in body said to me “They take a piece of your heart when they go, but give you a piece of theirs when they come.” She is beyond right, they all bring so much into your life and give you the ability to keep going.

We keep going because this isn't about us, its about them, they need us to keep going for them. Because for every dog we rescue there are 10 more waiting in shelters, being beaten in homes. There is always 1 more that needs us.

We may appear to be numb to many things death will never be one of them.

Thursday, December 6, 2018

35 acts of kindness post 1 of 2

This month I decided we were going to do random acts of kindness for our bored activity. This means a lot of prep work for mom lol.

Our acts of kindness are:

Bus fare taped to bus stops
Money taped to washing machines
Homeless bags
Warm bags
Kindness rocks
Kindness bookmarks
Flowers to the people in a retirement home
Flowers to the hospice
Hold the door
Let someone go ahead of us in line
Donate a toy to the toy drive
Donate to Slavation Army
Bring homemade cookies to firehall
Bring homemade treats to our local shelter
Give out Candy Canes
Pass sticker to children in line
Christmas Door Bomb
Pick up trash on a walk
Change taped to a vending machine
Pay for someones tim hortons
Colouring books and Crayons to the hospital
Cookies for the neighbour
Donate food to the local shelter
Cards to soliders over seas
Kindness dinosaurs
$5.00 in a book with a note
Tims card to mailman
Tape quarters to the candy machines at the mall

Because of the size of this blog post I am going to make 2!


Bus fare taped to bus stops

This one is pretty easy. We put change in small, clear baggies with a note saying this ride is on us. We will attach them to 3 bus stops around town.


Money on washing machines

This is another easy one. We put change in small, clear baggies with a note saying this load is on us. We will attach them to washing machines in each laundry mat in our city.

Homeless bags

This one is a little harder and costs more. It cost us around $125.00 to do 5 bags. What you need to put in your bags will depend on your location.

In our bags we put:
Travel tooth paste
Tooth brush
Gloves
Comb
Hat
Small reusable water bottle filled with water
Protein Bar
Fuzzy peaches
Mints
Hard candies
Hair ties
Socks
Bandaids
Pads
Homemade cookies
Oranges
$5.00 bill and a Christmas Card

Everything is put into a nice water proof bag with handles.We will hand them out to the homeless that I know live on the streets.

Warm bags

This one is a little more time consuming on my end because I have decided to use up my yarn and make the items for these bags instead of buying them.

Each will contain a hat, scarf, and gloves. They will be put in water proof bags and stapled to lampposts downtown. Every time I have a set ready I will refill the bags until the end of winter.

Kindness rocks

These will placed all around town. They will have a picture that Blaine paints on the front and on the back they will have a saying. They will be clear coated so they can stand up to the elements.


Kindness bookmarks

These will be printed on card stock have a picture and saying on them. They will be handed out at our local library.


Flowers to people in the retirement home

We are going to buy a couple dozen single stem flowers from our local flower shop and hand them out to the people at the retirement home. They will have a ribbon and a saying tied to them.


Flowers to the hospice

This will be done the same as the retirement home but it will be given to the family members


Hold the door

This is something we do everyday but this time I am going to make an effort to each Blaine that this act of kindness goes a long.


Let someone go ahead of us in line

We do this often for people who have fewer items than us, but this time I am going to make a point in showing Blaine that they have less stuff than us so we are going to let them go ahead.


Donate a toy to the toy drive.

Blaine is going to pick out a toy that he feels a boy or girl would like and then put it in the toy donation bin.


Donate to the Salvation Army

Blaine is going to put money into the bucket for them at the mall and I will explain what the money is used for.


Homemade treats to the fire hall

Our firefighters never get enough credit. They are always on scene first and take care of not only fires but medical as well. We will be taking homemade treats to all three of our fire halls.


Homemade treats for our local shelter.

Our shelter will not take treats that are not packaged but we can hand them out to people in line who are waiting to go in for food.